I’m sure many writers feel like this about our art. We write from an emotion, a feeling… something that we can’t exactly put a name to, not when 50,000 words will do a much better job at painting the picture we want to show the world.
It could be romance, dystopian fiction, sci-fi fantasy, horror, or a children’s story. Whatever it is, if it starts from an emotion, I’d like to call it art. It’s an interpretation of something inside us.
The reason I’m saying this is twofold: 1) Tate Gallery’s addition of Cezanne’s quote is just what I needed to hear this morning because I’ve come to the conclusion that I cannot for the life of me write to market, and 2) there are so many rip-off artists out there.
I tried giving myself a deadline early this year with a goal to write X number of books (I can’t remember now, to be honest), including those under a pen name that would tackle erotic romance and make tons of money. Yeah, right. Every time I’d start, I always dove right into deep POV and character (who is the heroine? Who is the hero? What are their motivations?) and totally messed up the whole theory behind K.I.S.S. or Keep It Simple Stupid.
Why can’t I keep it simple? Why can’t I just write a simple story and go right into the action? Why does it feel like pulling teeth?
Because I feel like a fraud doing it, that’s why.
The other day, I finally broke down and bought a PC laptop for the hubby who needs to master Excel for his job. He can’t do that on my Macbook because my Macbook and Microsoft Office just don’t gel; I also don’t use Office unless I really have to and even that feels like pulling teeth. So I set up the PC laptop and while perusing their App Store, was pleasantly surprised to see Ulysses, the markdown writing app I use to write on all my IOS devices.
$14.99 instead of $44.99? Definitely! I’m in, baby! Maybe having a PC isn’t so bad after all…
Then I tweeted the guys who developed Ulysses and told them I’m happy to see them have a version for the Microsoft store.
No wonder some of the shortcuts wouldn’t work on the Microsoft version. It’s a damn rip-off! I should have paid attention to the logo alone, which was different from what I see all the time when I open my MacBook and iPhone apps.
So I contacted Customer Services and requested a refund. They asked me if I was having any issues and I told them that I’d just found out it was a rip-off of the original app. The customer service rep told me the Microsoft store does not sell rip-offs.
Yes, you do, I told them. The makers themselves told me it’s a rip-off.
She said she’d send it to the higher-ups though I doubt anything will be done.
So what does this have to do with writing and emotion and art? I have no idea, but when I was chatting with the rep, I realized just how important it is to tap into the source of your writing. The guys that created the original (and in my opinion, the best) Ulysses app have a passion for creating the best writing product, hands down. The rip-off wanna be’s? Money. Just pure money.
It made me think of the story I was writing on that rip-off program, too. An erotic romance that had no heart and I just felt myself dragging with each word I wrote. I just wasn’t feeling it even though I told myself it’s writing to market; you got this, girl! When I got to 400 words, I stopped.
This is not why I write.
I write because I love it and it’s my passion and my art. It’s how I express myself best. It’s how I heal from invisible wounds that serve as the perfect foundation for my stories. Maybe one day I’ll learn how to write to market and make tons of money (ha!) but for now, I’ll stick to writing from emotion. It’s my art.
I’m also sticking to my Macbook.
Liz Durano 
I can’t tell you how much I can relate, Liz. I’m not a published author, aside from a few poems, but I’ve written many things, all from a place of emotion, and I am not sure I’m capable of keeping anything simple, lol. I HAVE to describe things viscerally – it’s how I feel them! And I cannot feel fraudulent. Period. In actuality, I’ve used it as an excuse (one of many) to not try to dive into a larger project. I think I’ve come to conclusion that I wrote because I have to. I wrote when my spirit tells me I need to. I don’t know, maybe one day that will lead to a bigger project, a story I feel like I have to tell. I really just write what I feel and whomever is meant to read it will, I suppose.
I appreciate you sharing very much. I’m happy you feel in a good place about what you write and how you write it. Authenticity always comes through to the reader. It’s the only kind of book I’ll read!
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Thank you so much, Kay! I love the way you write and I wish I were brave enough to do just that. I used to write more daring prose but that was as Morrighansmuse back when no one knew who was behind it, just a poet and writer with some pretty steamy thoughts. Things changed when I learned all about branding and newsletters and success as an author based on one’s ranking on the Amazon store and how many letters I have above my name (USA Today or NYT Bestselling Author). Today, there was a question posed about whether authors preferred newsletters or blogs and majority chose newsletters because they said that’s where their readers were. It made me realize that 90% of my newsletter subscribers are there because of free books and nothing else while less than 10% are there for my writing. And it made me realize how much I prefer blogging more because if a visitor didn’t like my blog, they’d move on. They’d also visit on their own if they liked it. I was in the minority to prefer blogging but I was fine with that 🙂
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Sorry it’s taken me so long to reply! Thank you. I’ve rummaged around and read some of that poetry and it’s exceptional! I’m certain all your work is. I actually haven’t read a romance novel in about 4 years, if you can believe that. I hadn’t ever read one until about 7 years ago, then I read them nearly exclusively for a couple years. I got burnt out. Then I experienced some life changes, began blogging and writing, and stopped reading all together for a couple years, which is crazy because books and words are as much a part of me as my arms and legs. I began reading again and it felt like a drink of water in the dessert! I missed it, so much. I’ll pick up a romance novel again, and I’ll read yours.
Seems to me you are heading in a direction that makes you happy, Liz. That’s wonderful!
Wow, there’s SO MUCH to consider, it’s mind boggling. Crazy. I suppose I’m not surprised about the people being there for the free books, but I’m with you, I would prefer blogging!
Cheers, Liz.💜
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I’m so glad you’re blogging and writing. Your poetry is amazing and just so full of passion! I stopped reading for awhile as well as writing, just focused on blogging and life. And then I started writing my stories which were grittier in the beginning and a lot bolder (also because I was writing as Morrighansmuse) and romance was just a secondary element. I read my first romance 4 years ago when I stumbled upon a website called Screwpulp which is now Leafless and then met a romance author on Wattpad whose novel I really enjoyed and she was very open to answering my questions about self-publishing. She gave me the courage to write and then publish my books.
One of the things I missed ever since I started taking my writing/publishing career more seriously is blogging. It took me awhile to build my platform as an author and it’s one reason I kept morrighansmuse.com as is, without adding much of my publishing stuff in there. I like to keep my poetry separate because it’s my true escape. Writing novels is, too, but it’s just a longer commitment, like an ongoing relationship with my characters LOL So happy you stopped by, Kay 🙂
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Thank you! What a journey, Liz!! It’s wonderful to witness. It’s also lovely to hear there are so many willing to connect and share and answer questions . That’s awesome.
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